Month 10: Public Elimination
We still haven’t used diapers at all except for one “just in case” that was on an extended outing of several hours with no facilities, but she had stayed dry. Mostly I just put on a diaper cover over her shorts rather than put on a prefold and she hasn’t thus far gone in her pants with the cover. She prefers to go potty at home so if she can hold it, she will. The only time she’ll go in a public restroom is when she really has reached saturation level. Otherwise, she stiffens and refuses to go. I’ll have to find a way to make the public toilet more comfortable. She’s heavier so I don’t think she likes being held in an in-arms potty position because its not comfortable any more.
Learning to respond to a diaper free babies when in restaurants and such places has its advantages and disadvantages. The advantage is that it doesn’t matter if the lavatory doesn’t have a changing table (and more than you realize don’t). I did the “change the newborn baby on my lap” routine in a tiny bathroom and that is not something I want to revisit! On the other hand, if you aren’t prepared or make a misjudgment your baby ends up with soggy pants halfway though the meal. I was caught without my carry bag a couple of times. Luckily, poops were saved for home. I hesitate to use the word “difficult” because, it isn’t that it is difficult. Babies are just inconvenient creatures no matter what you do! Though as this blogger puts it, with a diaper you have the choice of letting them wet themselves, let the diaper handle it, and take care of it later.
One day we were at a BBQ outing and she refused to go for 6 hours and waited until we were home and did all her business as soon as she was on the potty. The same for a Christening we were invited to. She went before we left, but from 1-5p she didn’t want to go and waited until we were home and peed twice within half an hour. That’s a long time and I need to make public loos more appealing for her so she can go when she needs to.
We’ve had a couple of poo and pee accidents, but generally those happen in the evening when she and we are distracted. She doesn’t always signal a need to go when she’s very busy doing something or is fascinated with eating–or it could be that she’s using a more subtle indicator and we just don’t notice it. It’s not that bad, though. When you catch a dozen poos and countless pees and only miss two or three, its not a big deal; especially when a particular voiding episode has you wondering where it was all stored and just which outfit of hers and yours would have been destroyed had she gone in a diaper. I would rather clean the occasional miss off the floor or trainers, than to clean creases after poop has been mashed in good from being sat upon — this ECer agrees.
Another interesting incident was at my mother-in-law’s. She didn’t want to go in the bathroom over there for some reason. When she saw a child’s rocking chair, however, she decided she couldn’t wait and she mistook it for a potty. She crawled to it, sat in it, and promptly peed. When she realized that she still had her pants on she stopped pooing. The look on her face was indignant surprise. She held her arms up and waited to be set on a toilet to finish.
We’ve gone several days without incident, and sometimes we have an accident once or twice a day. I still potty her twice at “night” — once at 2am when I normally get up when Daddy comes to bed and once around 6:30am just before he gets up for work. I may skip the 2am potty break for her since it isn’t much when she goes as prompted, and just go myself.
On 7/29 baby crawled past the potty in the living room and made a beeline on all fours to the bathroom and sat near her potty in there. She prompty did number 1 and number 2 as soon as I set her on it. One step back and two steps forward! It makes you forget about the daily accidents. Later with daddy she again ignored the potty in the living room, and sat in front of the bathroom potty chair and waited to be put on it! I know she knew what the bathroom was, but this was clear preference of location! She also whined in the wading pool in our yard until a potty was brought forth showing that she doesn’t want to soil herself or a play area! Later in the evening when I was at at work my Mother-in-law came to visit and fed her breastmilk, but they told me later that she put up a big fuss until she was put down. and promptly crawled to the potty nearby for an epic pee before resuming her dinner. That’s the first time she’s tried to communicate a potty need with someone other than me or Daddy. I’m doing the snoopy dance!
How she communicated her needs were varied as she grew. I do not know if this is common. Looking back, she communicated differently with each of us or had specific signals. With me it was often a wiggle or facial cue and I was trusted to know her mind intuitively. With Daddy it seemed more verbal signals and his unique timing method — he too had hit and misses. With his mom it was the most obviously physical. She apparently was paying close attention to how we responded to her communication attempts and adapted accordingly.
Posted on July 21, 2010, in Babies, Parenting, Potty Training and tagged diaper free, ec, elimination communication, month 10, natural infant hygiene, nih, potty learning. Bookmark the permalink. Leave a comment.